Recent News and Opinion
2014/7/22 - Lewisville Loses Appeal on Sex Offender Ordinance
2014/7/20 - Monday Morning Update
2014/7/20 - Take the Win in Iran
2014/7/19 - Combating Post-Traumatic Stress Event in Denton Saturday
2014/7/14 - Lewisville City Council Adopts Vision 2025 Plan
2014/7/6 - Photos from Lake Park on Independence Day
2014/7/6 - Updated: Council to Consider School Zones for LHS Campuses on Main...
2014/7/6 - Sunday Morning Update - Independence Day Weekend Edition
2014/7/5 - Local Groups Organizing Toiletry Drive for Unaccompanied Minor Imm...
2014/7/3 - Area Independence Day Celebrations and Fireworks
2014/6/30 - Movie Review: Transformers: Age of Extinction
2014/6/29 - Sunday Afternoon Update - Half-Way Through 2014 Edition
2014/6/25 - Updated: DCTA A-Train Tracks Damaged by Floods, Repaired Already
2014/6/24 - Police Arrest Serial Robber
2014/6/24 - Brewfest Photos
2014/6/23 - Monday Night Update - Welcome to Summer Edition
2014/6/21 - Lewisville Prepares for Once-a-Week Trash Pickup
2014/6/14 - Saturday Afternoon Update
2014/6/12 - Movie review: "The Fault in Our Stars" - 8/10
2014/6/10 - Lewisville Police Arrest Murder Suspect in Memphis Tennessee Home ...
2014/6/9 - Brave Combo Plays Free Concert Tuesday Night for Sounds of Lewisville
2014/6/8 - Sunday Night Update
2014/6/6 - Man Arrested on Child Porn Charges After Wife Alerts Police
2014/6/1 - Another Drowning on Lewisville Lake
2014/5/31 - 2014 NTDR Roller Derby Videos
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More Layoffs Today at WhosPlayin

Links, Thoughts, and Open Thread
Posted by WhosPlayin on 2009/1/28 10:40:00 (2887 reads)

Effective immediately, WhosPlayin Communications, Inc. announces layoffs of 46,000 employees from our local blogging division. This cost-cutting move is expected to save the company up to $42.38 a year. Employees, who were waiting on a weather cancellation notice this morning, were notified via robocall not to show up for work. The company followed the robocall with an email, which is excerpted below:

Dear Former Employees:
We just wanted to take this opportunity to send you bloodsucking parasites one final "fuck you" while your free email accounts still work. When I asked you ungrateful bastards to help me polish up the corporate jet, many of you bitched and moaned about not having enough "family time". When we moved our corporate headquarters to the Cayman Islands, we offered you incompetent boobs free round-trip airfare to anyone willing to smuggle large bundles of cash in their carry-on luggage.

We would talk about how much we regret the layoffs, but frankly, we can outsource your jobs to India and save enough money to buy a new corporate yacht AND pay for our "Read Local Bloggers" marketing blitz.

In closing, smell ya later, bitches. We'll be posting a form letter-of-recommendation later, that you can download and fill out for yourself, if you think it will do you any good. TTYN. Signed Dick S. Over, President


Mr. Over could not be reached for comment because... well, we just didn't give a crap. Suckit, Over.



Keywords:
- Satire

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Other articles
2014/7/22 23:30:00 - Lewisville Loses Appeal on Sex Offender Ordinance
2014/7/20 23:54:58 - Monday Morning Update
2014/7/20 11:02:51 - Take the Win in Iran
2014/7/19 7:35:38 - Combating Post-Traumatic Stress Event in Denton Saturday
2014/7/14 20:50:00 - Lewisville City Council Adopts Vision 2025 Plan
2014/7/6 22:00:00 - Photos from Lake Park on Independence Day
2014/7/6 10:40:00 - Updated: Council to Consider School Zones for LHS Campuses on Main and FM 3040
2014/7/6 9:50:17 - Sunday Morning Update - Independence Day Weekend Edition
2014/7/5 13:10:00 - Local Groups Organizing Toiletry Drive for Unaccompanied Minor Immigrants
2014/7/3 11:00:00 - Area Independence Day Celebrations and Fireworks


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